Atkin just left after bringing me chicken and watching Terminator. It was a good movie, although my mind was occupied. I now am sitting here alone in the dark and letting my mind wander. I know, it is never a good thing when it happens. Right now, all I feel like is a backup plan. What is it about me that makes guys want to keep me on the back burner? Why am I not good enough to come first? Why am I not a priority? Is this why gay men are so bitter? I know no one is exempt from heartache. Those very words come out of my own mouth, but come on, somethings got to give.


It is 1:17AM. Tomorrow is already here, but it is not yet a new day.