Oh boy is it late?! I can't sleep at all. I spent most of my day trying to convince Gil that there's a better way to manage our finances. He's not too sold on any of my ideas. It's frustrating because I can understand why. I understand that this relationship is very and how he could be very apprehensive. I on other hand have made a decision that if this is going to work, I need to put my pride and apprehensions aside. Gil keeps on suggesting that I move in after Marcus moves. I kept on telling Gil we'll see for the same reason he responds to the idea of how we manage our finanaces. It's scary. We're not just investing our financial well being into the relationship, but also hopes, dreams, committment, understanding, support and values into something so new. It's a big step and a big risk. But like my father always say, big results don't come without taking big risks. Every decision that I've been making is not just for my financial well-being, but also for the both of us. I've sacraficed car insurance so that I could put a little more money away so I can get my financial crisis squared away, that way the sooner we can reach our moving back to CA goal. Instead of eating out all the time I've started to eat more Ramen and tuna at home. I've even started to not waste gas and stayed at home more on my days off. I'm also going into work on Sunday to do overtime. I haven't done overtime in two years. If it was just me, I wouldn't even think about doing any of these things. But I'm no longer single.


I can't sleep at all because I'm so stressed and frustrated. I've spent most of the night talking to Marcus about random things. This now will be my fourth attempt at sleeping. Don't be surprise if I return to blog again. Good night for now!